1. Thou shalt not be prefect, or even try to be.

2. Thou shalt not try to be all things to all people.

3. Thou shalt leave things undone that ought to be done.

4. Thou shalt not spread thyself too thin.

5. Thou shalt learn to say NO.

6. Thou shalt schedule time for thyself and thy supportive network.

7. Thou shalt switch off and do nothing regulary.

8. Thou shalt be boring, untidy, inelegant and unattractive at times.

9. Thou shalt not even feel guilty.

10. ESPECIALLY, thou shalt not be thine worst enemy but thy best friend.

LEGEND OF THE GEESE

In the fall, did you notice geese heading south for the winter, flying in their customary "V" formation? If so, you might be interested to know what scientists have discovered about their flying habits.

As each bird flaps its wings, it creates an uplift fo rthe bird immediately following. Thus by flying ia a "V" formation, the whole flock adds at least 71 percent flying range than if each bird flies on its own.

BASIC TRUTH #1:

Whenever a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistanc of trying to go it alone. Hence, it quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front.

BASIC TRUTH #2:

When the lead goose gets tired, he rotates to the back and another goose flies point.

BASIC TRUTH #3:

The geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up thier speed.

BASIC TRUTH #4:

Finally, when a goose gets sick, or is wounded by gun shot and falls out of formation twoo geese fall out with him down to help and protect him. They stay with him intil he is either able to fly or until he is dead. Then they launch out on their own or join another formation to catch up with their own group.

FINAL TRUTH:

If we follow the example of geese, we will stand by each other like that.

10

TIPS FOR

FAMILY

CAREGIVERS

Choose to TAKE CHARGE of your life, and don't let your loved one's illenss or disability always take center stage.

Remember to be good to yourself. Love, honor and value yourself. You're doing a very hard job and you deserve some quality time, just for you.

Watch out for signs of depression and don't delay in getting professional help when you need it.

When people offer to help, accept the offer and suggest specific things that they can do.

Educate yourself about your loved one's condition. Information is empowering.

There's a difference between caring and doing. Be open to technologies and ideas that promote your loved one's independence.

Trust your instincts. Most of the time they'll lead you in the right direction.

Grieve for your losses, and then allow yourself to dream new dreams.

Stand up for you rights as a caregiver and a citizen.

SEEK SUPPORT from other caregivers. There is great strength in knowing you are not alone.

QUOTES

"Humor helps us cope becaue it instantly removes us from pain."

"When we find some humor in our upsets they no longer seem as large or as important as they once did."

"Laughter is inner jogging."

"In matter of humor, what is appealing to one person is appalling to another."

"A smile is a curve that sets everything straight."

"The most completely lost of all days is the one on which we have not laughed."

"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people."

"Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been."

"Laughter need not be cut out of anything, since it improves everything."

"Nothing is better than the unintended humor of reality."

"He deserves paradise who makes his companions laugh."

"He who laughs, lasts."

1. Robinson, Vera, Humor and the Health Professions, Thorofare, N.J., Slack, Inc. 1991.
2. Cousins, Norman, Anatomy of an Illness, New York, Norton, 1979.
3. Paulson, Terry, Making Humor Work: Take Your Job Seriously and Yourself Lightly, Menlo Park,California,1989.
4. Peter, Laurence and Dana, The Laughter Prescription, New York, Ballantine Books, 1982.
5. Klein, Allen, The Healing Power of Humor, Los Angeles, Tarcher, 1989.
6. Adasiak, Janette, Humor and the Alzheimer's Patient: The Psychological Basis, American Journal of Alzheimer's Care and Research, Vol. 4, No. 4, Weston, MA, 1989.